Thoughts around communities: on and off-line

sustainatives
May 31, 2021
5 min read

Questions around community living and meaningful relationship dynamics have been coming up for me recently.

I’ve come across a blog post [1] of Cynthia Tina sharing about her journey as a digital nomad.

Having found her blog through the

Foundation of Intentional Community, or FIC [2] (which I use as a resource for intentional and community living), a part of me was curious to hear about her story and really wanted to hear what she had to share. As I was reading, I was also curious by another part of me that was reading her post with an analytical eye.

It seems anything that mentions digital/social media/internet/online/digital devices catches my attention, mostly because I’m on this journey of researching what roles the internet and digital technology play in our lives.

As I was reading her post I kept picking up sentences and words that affirmed my view of how much the world is being digitalised these days. She spoke about how digital nomads are just a branch of (or perhaps the evolution of?) the more traditional view of nomads: explorers, gypsies, sailors, prophets, traders etc. It was mentioned although digital nomads connect and gather through the uses of digital tech such as computers and phones, they are still a type of community.

But wait a second...

My critical eye paused for a second. A community of digital nomads?

I realised: I’ve been part of this group… In fact, I might still be part of it.

I've also travelled around (to other countries, but also within Australia), and have used online platforms such as blogging or social media to share about my journey or keep in touch with people I meet.

While reading I couldn’t connect with the author’s words, feeling the conflict I have with digital technology. The questions and uncertainties I have about social media and the modern world heading towards a more digitalised society feels too strong at this stage to just accept someone’s story of how they find technology advancements a positive. I thought it hypocritical to be part of a group such as FIC, speaking about cultivating deep community connections through intentional lifestyles, while also advocating for the increase in our use of digital technology. And to be perfectly honest, I’m not entirely sure how to bridge the two.

Paradoxes in Life

However, I realised life was filled with these paradoxes- which I find is a much kinder (and still appropriate, in this case) word than ‘hypocritical’:

You have someone who eats a vegan diet but may have cats that only eat meat.
You have people living on self-sufficient properties who own fossil fuel-generated cars to drive in and out to gather materials for their projects.
Sugar-free cookbooks that still uses some sugar in their recipes, but just not processed or refined sugar (ie coconut sugar).
Eco-friendly products that are packaged in single use or ‘recyclable’ plastic (still plastic… and some people don’t bother to recycle it).
Businesses that offer services that help quieten and relax the mind and body, for use to just continue entering stressful environments all for the sake of up-keeping our modern lifestyles of more to-dos and continuous agendas.
Solar panels that are created from fossil-fuelled created parts.
Asking a mentor/counsellor for guidance around navigating digital tech through a Zoom call session.
Wanting to cultivate more ‘slower’ activities such as dabbling in watercolours, or perhaps knitting, or whittling, and realising all or some of the materials you are using are synthetic (ie knitting with acrylic wool, or using a whittling knife that has plastic on it).
People who choose to eat a dairy-free diet because of the issues with ethics when it comes to dairy farming, so people opt to use things like coconut milk (high food miles) or almond milk (uses lots of water during production).

I can’t just look at these situations with a critical eye and say the work is done; there is more at play here than farming ethics, or material production, or what diet one ‘should’ eat. Because what if the person eating a vegan diet rescued the cat? Or the dairy-free person is actually lactose intolerant? Or the people living self-sufficiently with fossil-fuelled cars live very far away from towns or cities and need a vehicle in case of emergencies and only occasionally also use to drive out to grab materials?

I’ve come to realise that I also have to look at these situations from a human, or heart-centred, point of view. Shaming people for doing actions I don’t do or wouldn’t dream myself making doesn’t help the situation. Instead, I’m learning to come from a place of being curious. Why do they act/speak/think/feel the way they do? Why don’t I see it that way too? How can I connect with this person even if it seems we have certain differences- big or small?

Connecting With People

Is this the way we forge deeper connections or sustain communities? By setting the intention that we will practice exploring ways of connecting, even when it’s hard or conflict arises?

Come to think of it, that’s how it is between my partner and I. He and I have our share of conflicts and tensions and differences. Through it all we have been able to work through it, to come back to a place of connectivity and open-heartedness. A places where forgiveness, acceptance and love flows easier between us. I cannot control him, and he I, nor would I want to. I wish the relationship to be supportive and inspiring and healing.

Maybe this is the kind of mindset we need to cultivate in order to forge deep and meaningful communities and relationships. On or off-line.

Maybe it doesn’t matter so much if we use digital technology, or if we do things in person.

I’m still finding this hard to believe, but I’m more open to seeing digital technology as something we can actually feel like we have a choice with. Something we have full autonomy when it comes to using it, or living in a world with it present in our day to day lives.

The journey continues to unfold…